Round Here

Oh gawd. Well. Friday night, after reading the bojillion comments about Ben Folds’ “The Luckiest,” which I’ve owned for years, but honestly never really listened to (thank you, skip function), because I vacillate wildly on Ben Folds, I gave it a listen. See, on the one hand, I really dig him, but in truth, I like him on quirky irreverent songs, and can’t quite take him seriously on any sort of love song level, despite a rather steamy dream to the contrary a few years ago. His voice can be a bit twee for my taste, especially when he’s singing about something oh-so-serious and a little romantic, and even as I write this, my lips are curled like I took a whiff of Sunny’s morning breath, because ew, Ben Folds, you annoy me sometimes.

He’s just … well, he’s too precious for me, I guess, and I’ll admit a mere perfunctory listen to the first five or six bars of “The Luckiest,” before promptly hitting skip for about four years now. Except, shit, that ending? It brought me to a bit of snarfling right there in bed, which both freaked out and irritated Adam, and prompted a bit of panic, because he really didn’t expect to end the day hearing his wife snorfle and wheeze over nothing important. Incidentally, I had the same reaction the day I listened — actually listened — to the lyrics to Peter Gabriel’s “No Way Out” and started to imagine Adam’s bloody body on the ground and when combined with the PMS I was already feeling, there quite a bit of was sobbing in bed, because Adam, don’t leave me here again! Don’t leave me like this! I’M NOT QUITTING ON YOU! THERE’S NO WAY OUT!

Speaking of Adam, he’s currently reading a book on modern interpretations of American history, and for the last week or so, he’s been peppering conversation with delightful facts gleaned along the way, and if you didn’t think Paul Revere could be brought up in regular day’s activities, you were sorely mistaken. He is much more relevant than I anticipated, and any discussion can be used as a springboard, apparently. (“That two if by sea thing went over like a lead balloon!”) Thank you, Dr. History.

Aside from unprovoked history lessons, our weekend was astonishingly low-key, and involved lots of laying about, some Hot Fuzz and some freelance work, which brings me to the irritating Law of Freelance Work. Whenever a big freelance project comes up, I am inevitably kicked in the head with a large unexpected bill or–my personal favorite–several large bills. Previous incarnations have included dental bills, physical therapy deductibles and, yes, our friends the IRS. Saturday, I landed a new freelance project, and within two hours, was promptly handed two unexpected events that directly negate the cost of the project. Ha ha. HA HA!

Granted, one was an iPod death that I’ve been expecting for about a year now, given that I’d bought mine in 2004, which is apparently LIGHT YEARS in iPod life. And yes, while many would argue that it’s not a necessity on the level of, say, the oxygen sensor that needed to be replaced in my car, aside from my laptop, my iPod is the one accessory I use every day, so, ah, there you have it. And welcome Rhonda, my new iPod, to the family! Hello, Rhonda! Incidentally, I played with the iPhone while picking her up, and I wasn’t that impressed. I mean, it’s pretty and all, but after all the hype, I expected the phone to strip naked and clean my toilets.

Don’t get me wrong — I’m grateful. I’m thrilled that I have the work, and that even with these two events, I’m breaking even, it’s just that once, JUST ONCE, I’d like to have extra wads of unexpected cash lying about to do something wild and crazy with. You know, like depositing them in a money market account, because again, as a Capricorn, that’s as nuts as I get, and sometimes–and this is really off the hook–I forget to sign the deposit slip. Whooo!

And finally, we’re being plagued by spiders, just PLAGUED, like it’s some sort of insane spider season or something, for despite a clean house and mad vacuuming, I’m killing up to two a day. Except tonight, as I was taking off my shoe to give one the old smack-and-scream, Sunny got a glimpse of him and snorfled him up like a piece of kibble. And yes, she kisses her mother with that mouth.

Happy Monday to you! I hope your weekend was much more exciting.

*Counting Crows

22 comments August 26th, 2007