Trouble in the Message Centre
December 4th, 2007
Please ignore me, just please … ignore me. I’m scary, and I’m taking it out on all kinds of creatures! A Fine Frenzy! Zadie Smith! Ayelet Waldman! Is no one safe from my wrath? Apparently not, and vitriol is mine to own this week, and I’m not sure I realized it until this afternoon, when I smoked five cigarettes in quick succession and still clamored for more (I quit three years ago), and ranted for a full fifteen minutes about the quality or lack thereof of my turkey sandwich and I meant it.
(Also, hey, did anyone catch A Fine Frenzy’s “Hope for the Hopeless” on House tonight? Hi, I can’t pick music for shit, nice to meet you!)
I apologize, really, it’s just … it’s been a bit of a bad week (all this before hump day!), and I’m not even ready to talk about it like a rational person, but, lest anyone get sucked into Needless Internet Drama, rest assured that it is spectacularly boring if you’re anyone but me, and it’s not even a little dramatic or exciting. In terms of Big Things in Life, I’m fine, just in a bit of a perfect storm of pissy due to a convergence of irritating things, some big, some small, and I’m sure you’ve all been there. Shit happens, but that doesn’t mean it’s fair to unload all over the place and take it out on strange people, I’m sorry! I’m sorry!
(I’m not that sorry, Ayelet.)
And though it’s not like I owe anyone an explanation, because really, who is waiting with bated breath? How presumptuous can I be? Except I’m saying it anyway: I’m going to take the rest of the week away from here to figure some stuff out, get some sleep, read my fabulous book (thank you!) and get over myself and stop acting like such a hoity asshole.
But not before I leave you with the image of my neighbors’ giant light-up Christmas trees in their front yard with GIANT GLEAMING COLORED BULBS, which is hilarious enough (I totally admire their spirit, really I do, because it’s so in your face! And Christmasy! Elf Adam would absolutely approve), it’s just that … it plays Christmas carols in faux-classical style and the lights blink in unison! And the trees sway! And you can hear it three blocks away!
So I’ll see you Monday! Have a great week!
*Blur
Entry Filed under: Nuttin'
22 Comments Add your own
1. She Likes Purple | December 4th, 2007 at 8:07 pm
Enjoy your week off. You deserve it and no one thinks you’re an asshole. I surely don’t think you’re an asshole.
2. Emily | December 4th, 2007 at 8:27 pm
Just to cheer you up: The word “hoity” reminds me that a few years ago Dave, in ALL SERIOUSNESS, pronounced something “hooty tooty.”
He was just mispronouncing hoity toity. I HAVE NEVER LET HIM FORGET.
3. Orange Peacock | December 4th, 2007 at 9:13 pm
Well, *I* never thought you were being an asshole. I mean, I guess if you’d ranted about ME I would have, but really, nobody should take offense at your third-party rants. I hope you feel better or at least less stressed soon. I’m in the thick of finals and ready to bludgeon the next person to annoy me, for what it’s worth.
Tis the season! And your neighbors’ house sounds like that house from the Youtube video, except less classy.
4. Suebob | December 4th, 2007 at 9:25 pm
Have a good week off.
In other literary news, I finished “Special Topics in Calamity Physics,” threw it on the ground, and stomped on it.
5. Kathryn | December 4th, 2007 at 9:41 pm
Well, if it makes you feel any better, your Ayelet Waldman rant is totally justified. What a twatburger. And I bet your turkey sandwich was kind of sucky–I trust your opinion.
Hope you enjoy Devil in the White City–I thought it was great!
6. Mauigirl52 | December 4th, 2007 at 9:55 pm
I could use a few days off after the week I’ve had too (and yes, I know it’s only Tuesday. It feels like a whole week). And I echo the other sentiments – you’re never an asshole. But don’t start smoking again!
7. Amy K | December 4th, 2007 at 10:38 pm
Hope your week improves soon! By the way, I owe you a huge thank you for mentioning Jesca Hoop recently – I’d never heard of her before, and now Kismet is on frequent rotation in my CD player. Good stuff.
8. Kristin H | December 5th, 2007 at 5:43 am
I had to laugh at your neighbor’s Christmas tree. You can siphon their Christmas cheer since you’re not doing any decorating of your own. Have a great week!
9. Heather B. | December 5th, 2007 at 7:25 am
You are SO not an asshole. I’m having a similar week full of mean people and bitches and people who really could be Asshole of the Year. I may even throw out the ‘c’ word a few deserving women.
I feel you. Enjoy the rest of the week.
10. Amity | December 5th, 2007 at 8:02 am
Oh, I thought maybe the image of the neighbor’s trees was missing from your post, then I finally realized it was the MENTAL image you were presenting us with… I think in this case photographic evidence may be necessary.
11. Andrea | December 5th, 2007 at 9:48 am
Hey, I had one of those weeks recently, and it damn near killed me. So be an asshole if that’s what helps you get through it, though for the record, I don’t think you’re being an asshole. I agree with you about Ayelet. And I think Kathryn’s use of “twatburger” may have just made my day. I’m totally stealing that, Kathryn, just so’s you know! But maybe something will happen at the end of this week to totally make the bad shit go away. Here’s to hoping!
I second the photographic evidence. Or maybe a YouTube video of your own.
12. claire | December 5th, 2007 at 1:00 pm
Jeeze, i hope everything works out for you. Sounds like you’re having a rough week.
But, Suebob? I just picked up “Special Topics in Calamity Physics”. Sounds like you’re saying not to bother….
13. cassidy | December 5th, 2007 at 5:55 pm
Good luck with everything! Hope you are feeling better soon. Oh how I’ll miss you.
14. Suebob | December 5th, 2007 at 8:10 pm
Claire – pages 1-300 are pretty annoying. Then it gets good for about 150 pages more or less. Then at the end it sucks again. Sigh.
15. jonniker | December 5th, 2007 at 8:12 pm
Can I be lame and say how cool it is that you guys are talking about books in my comments section and I’m not even involved? Love. Love you guys, seriously. It’s so funny and awesome, all at the same time.
16. elise | December 6th, 2007 at 12:50 am
I spent an embarrassing amount of time waiting for the page to finish loading so I could see the neighboring Christmas tree you spoke of.
Needless to say, I eventually figured out that “leave you with the image of” could be a WORD image, not just a visual one. And people call me dumb!
17. Joni | December 6th, 2007 at 6:06 am
I think it is a universal crappy week. I recommend taking a mental health day and staying in bed to watch craptastic movies like Elf, Superbad and Zoolander. Hilarity will ensue and then it makes all the drama a wee bit funnier.
18. thatgirlfromcolorado | December 6th, 2007 at 9:29 am
I don’t think you’re an asshole. In fact, you totally made my holiday season brighter with the phrase “perfect storm of pissy.” I’ll be throwing that around left and right in the coming weeks.
19. claire | December 6th, 2007 at 12:11 pm
Suebob – it’s kind of a hefty book to decide in the end that it sucked. Kudos to you for actually finishing it. : ) if i make it past pg 150, i’ll see if i can actually follow through. the author, she seems ridiculously pretentious. and wordy.
Jonna – I’m glad you’re not upset about my thread-jacking. and besides, if you’re not going to be posting for the rest of the week, we might as well make your comments section into a message board… heh.
20. Suebob | December 6th, 2007 at 4:59 pm
Claire – it is only because my work computer was broken for 3 solid days and I had NOTHING to do. I was desperate.
21. ali | December 7th, 2007 at 5:27 pm
um, yeah, sleep and a good book sound just about perfect to me.
what’re you reading?
22. Sarcomical | December 8th, 2007 at 2:07 am
now as i sit and try to read through posts and get a feel for what you’re dealing with right now, i feel so bad that i have slacked in keeping up with you (and so many people lately).
i hope your time off renews you and helps give you some time you need to feel better! we all need that sometimes. it’s just easier to breathe away from it all some days.
take the VERY BEST CARE of yourself.
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