Re-offender
April 30th, 2008
My skin doesn’t like Vermont very much. Since we moved here, it’s been … well, a mess, really, and not a day hasn’t gone by when I haven’t been rocking what can only be described as pizza face. It did the same thing when we first moved to Florida, and eventually I got into a good groove by finally acquiescing to a decent moisturizing regimen, including a night moisturizer that I really loved (Boscia, if you’re wondering) and the clouds parted, and I had great skin until we got here and it all went to hell in a handbasket. I changed it up last night in an effort to reclaim great skin, and truly, I didn’t think it could get any worse, but hey, um, WOW. IT DID.
I used Burt’s Bee’s Radiance Night Cream with royal jelly, which sounds so absolutely gross, does it not? Like, it sounds like sexytime lube for bees, which I just don’t want to smear on my face. I know that’s not what it is, but dude, it’s called ROYAL JELLY. And it’s a SECRETION. BAHRGH.
No matter. I woke up this morning with FIVE BRAND-NEW ZITS of the extra-ooky variety, if you know what I’m saying. So no jelly for me. And perhaps none for you, for if you have oily skin, dude, RUN. RUN AWAY FROM THE BEE LUBE. Which brings me to the fact that I am now in the market for a new night cream, and because I don’t even live near a department store, I’d like something I can get at Rite-Aid. Call me cheap, but it’s mostly laziness and a hatred for mail-order. Do you have any recommendations?
Speaking of cheap, I got a library card at lunch today, when I realized that I’ve been spending an ungodly amount of money on books for an ungodly amount of time. I don’t even think I THOUGHT about the amount of trips I took to the bookstore, because I told myself, “It’s for books! Books are good for you!” I had a backlog of reading material that carried me through since we moved here, but in the last three weeks, I’ve spent upwards of $50 PER WEEK OR MORE on books. I’m sorry to say as well, that it’s because we only have a locally-owned bookstore here and NOTHING is discounted, ever — I mean, I’m all for buying local, but there’s something to be said for Barnes & Noble’s prices, I’m shamed to admit. Especially when my lifelong voracious reading habits suddenly mean I won’t buy any books at all. (I’m sorry authors! I’m sorry! Local is EXPENSIVE! Like, uh, more than $200-per-month expensive! Reading is supposed to be a cheap, at-home entertainment-type activity!)
Anyway, for some reason, the library card makes me feel virtuous, like the Elizabeth Berg novel I nabbed today helps me to contribute to society. It doesn’t. But I still feel SPECIAL. I have a LIBRARY CARD and am saving MONEY. Someone give me a cookie.
(Also, can I tell you again how much I love Goodreads, as it totally appeals to the listmaker in me and I’m embarrassed at the amount of procrastination I do there by browsing reviews and books and MAKING MORE LISTS.)
And finally, in the land of biting off more than you can chew, I — who have until this point only attempted culinary challenges to the level of SHAKE ‘N BAKE — thought that since we have no Thai restaurants near us, that I would attempt homemade pad thai. And folks, there is a reason that kids don’t grow up eating pad thai as a familiar comfort food, along with meatloaf and mashed potatoes. This is because it’s HARD. AND AWFUL. AND VERY, VERY DISGUSTING. AND NOT LIKE IT IS IN RESTAURANTS. I finished working at 5:30 and started dinner, thinking that it would be easy! The Web site said it was easy! We’d be eating by 6:15!
HA. We ate at 7:30, if by “ate” you mean took one bite each and nearly threw up in our mouths, because again, oh my sweet God.
“It tastes like soap! But it’s … it’s sort of okay.” Adam was horrified, but trying to be a good sport.
“No! NO! It tastes like PASTE in elementary school — no no, PASTE IS BETTER! THIS TASTES LIKE ROTTING PASTE! WITH SOUR FRUIT.” And it was. It was awful. So awful. So, so awfully awful.
I was almost in angry pad-thai’d tears, because dude, it was HARD. There were MANY INGREDIENTS. They were CHOPPED and for chrissake, I used MISE EN PLACE. WITH RAMEKINS. The kitchen was trashed like it has never been trashed before. Scallions littered the floor like confetti, while the refrigerator door was smeared with a slash of tamarind paste that resembled a bloodstain. Splashes of oily garlic were caked to the walls above the stove, and I used every pot we owned, along with the wok, which lay haphazardly askew in the sink, the sticky noodles permanently etched onto its surface, never to be removed again. I was sweating, despite the fact that it SNOWED TODAY. (Did I not mention it fucking SNOWED TODAY? WELL, IT DID.)
And because by the time this all wrapped up, it was 8 p.m., and because we live in a town where NOTHING IS AVAILABLE AFTER SEVEN WITHOUT A BIG PRODUCTION, and I … I had no back-up plan at all … I had a McDonald’s cheeseburger for dinner, while Adam had a Quarter Pounder. Thai food is awesome.
(Seriously? My last meal was SHAKE ‘N BAKE. What was I THINKING? I AM NOT SMITTEN KITCHEN. Also? Tamarind tastes like absolute shit, as does fish sauce, I’m sorry. And as a sauce, together? Over NOODLES? WITH VERY LITTLE BLUNTING INGREDIENTS? NO NO NO.)
Have a great Thursday!
*Travis
Entry Filed under: Food follies!,Nuttin'
45 Comments Add your own
1. Robin | April 30th, 2008 at 6:08 pm
Okay, that’s it, my current tequila situation is such that I’m officially commenting here.
So, when you ask for drugstore moisturizer recommendations, what I hear is “Hey Robin, please tell me about your awesome, expensive, Sephora-or-department-store-only moisturizer, kthx love Jonna.” And so I say, funny you should ask, because you would love (LOVE LOVE) Philosophy Hope in a Jar. Really, It’s light – but effective! – and it’s also lightly exfoliating. And it IS expensive (although I would totally recommend the Makeup Optional kit, which is more expensive, but, uh, “cheaper” by some convoluted multiproduct logic), but if you don’t like it or whatever, you can totally return it. Open! No questions asked!
So in summary, hi I’m Robin, Philophy=AWESOME!
2. kirida | April 30th, 2008 at 6:20 pm
Cetaphil is my all-purpose night cream. It’s cheap and it gives me a few minutes of pretending like I’m in a Japanese kabuki. Win-win!
3. jonniker | April 30th, 2008 at 6:25 pm
Oh no! Oh Robin, I am SO WANTING TO ENCOURAGE THE COMMENTING by saying yes! Yes I LOVE Philosophy! Except something in their whole product line disagrees with my face. I am constantly cringing because two women I love, Amalah and Sundry, SWEAR by Philosophy. And I have yet to see the holy light, for it hates me.
And yet, can I tell you that every time someone recommends it to me, I am SO TEMPTED to try it again?
I’m not averse to something pricey — Boscia wasn’t super-cheap, my any means, and I LOVED it. I’m just lazy, I’m sorry to say. But if there’s something ONLY available at Sephora, I will bend! I will!
4. Gwen | April 30th, 2008 at 6:27 pm
I’d second the Philosophy Hope In A Jar if you feel like buying something online. I personally don’t like it, as my skin is super dry and sensitive, but my husband has relatively oily skin and loves it. (Apparently one day he decided he needed a moisturizer, so he went to Sephora on his lunch break and picked it out. I’m still in shock.)
5. Gwen | April 30th, 2008 at 6:30 pm
Ha, so scratch that last comment. I’m the same way with Philosophy products. Have you tried Kiehl’s Yerba Mate? (Again with the not a drugstore brand — sorry! But if you buy Kiehl’s online, they’ll let you pick out samples of other products, so at least you could try a few things at once.) It’s what I use when I’m in Atlanta in the summer and everything else feels gross and heavy. And as for actual drugstore brands, I’ve never had bad luck with Neutrogena or Oil of Olay.
6. Jess | April 30th, 2008 at 6:37 pm
Okay, two things. First, I make a Weight Watchers version of pad thai, and while it doesn’t really resemble the dish you eat in restaurants like, at all, it’s good, or at least decent. I mean, perhaps our palates have been ruined by months and months of Weight Watchers meal, but Torsten and I both like it. So maybe don’t give up on the pad thai as a whole? Try a totally different recipe? Mine involves, essentially, peanut butter, soy sauce, egg, and shrimp.
Second, when I moved from North Carolina to Massachusetts for school, I had no idea what it would do to my skin. The face breakouts weren’t SO bad but oh my god the HANDS. My knuckles bled all winter until I finally learned that I had to bathe my hands in Vaseline intensive lotion for approximately three hours per day.
7. Heather B. | April 30th, 2008 at 6:46 pm
1) I always have a pizza face. No matter what I try I look like hell.
2) It snowed here yesterday as well. Welcome to the Great North!
8. Danell | April 30th, 2008 at 7:19 pm
Um, I can’t even get my DERMATOLOGIST to give me anything to fix the zits. Because apparently if there aren’t CYSTS involved, then you aren’t suffering enough for REAL help. So…no help here, but definitely sympathy.
And did you mean for us to laugh at the pad thai imagery? Because that was hilarious! Although, as with the zits, I feel for you…I haven’t had a good pad thai in FOREVER. We got one of those kits from the grocery store to try one time, and….yech. But at least it wasn’t super hard work just to be disappointed. I am MUCH too lazy to attempt most of the recipes, because, yeah…HARD.
9. tutugirl1345 | April 30th, 2008 at 7:20 pm
Have you tried the Pad Thai boxes from A Taste of Thai? They come with noodles and sauce, and all you have to supply is some meat, cilantro and lime for a delicious yummy meal. Its very easy and doesn’t require lots of work. It definitely not virtuous in any sense, but could quell your thai cravings
10. Mandee | April 30th, 2008 at 7:20 pm
I’m trying to figure out how to wok “sexytime lube for bees” into every day conversation.
Drugstore brands that have worked for me–Cetaphil, Purpose and Complex 15. You usually have to ask the pharmacist to order Complex 15, but it’s not prescription.
I can’t stand her, but I use Rachel Ray’s Chicken Curry in a Hurry (so stupid) as my base recipe and it’s relatively easy and good. She uses something (gross) other than coconut milk, but make that one substitution (one can of coconut milk) and it’s pretty good. Maybe that will help with the Thai craving.
11. Kate | April 30th, 2008 at 7:42 pm
I’ll chime in about the Philosophy stuff. I love the face wash Purity and the When Hope Is Not Enough firming serum, but the Hope in a Jar moisturizer makes me nauseous. The smell of it. Something about it, combined with MY body chemistry, somehow produces an odor that resembles wet dog mixed with something unpleasantly soapy. I keep trying to use it thinking “But it FEELS so nice on my skin” and the a couple hours later I’m on the verge of a migraine from the smell. Ack. But it still looks pretty and somewhat fancy schmancy sitting on my bathroom counter.
Alas, I just use the Oil of Olay moisturizer that I’ve used since I was 18. I’m not sure it’s helping me “look younger too” though.
And about the Phad Thai? I’ve heard it’s one of the hardest Thai dishes to cook from scratch. Damnit. Totally not your fault. Blame the Thai people who created it.
12. vague | April 30th, 2008 at 8:02 pm
I will definitely be checking back here to see about the face recommendations. I am currently using Philosophy, a splurge I thought I needed to make after I moved from a temperate-rainforest-type climate to a more tropical-swamp-type climate and my face erupted in an extreme demonstration of pizzaness. Oh my, it has been horrible since I moved. Anyway, the Philosophy Hope in a Bottle, for congested skin, has NOT worked as I had hoped. At all. It feels horrible and makes my face both drier and greasier at the same time. Ugh. Sorry I am no help on this, but I do sympathize with the chaotic-move-induced bad skin.
13. Blythe | April 30th, 2008 at 11:31 pm
I use Cetaphil cleanser and Neutrogena light night cream. They make me feel all fresh-scrubbed like Jennifer Love Hewitt. (I am, incidentally, fascinated by who Neutrogena chooses to hawk (hock?) their products. Who will be the latest to be dubbed Squeaky Clean?)
14. Swistle | May 1st, 2008 at 4:03 am
1) I like Oil of Olay Night Firming Cream. $6. But my skin is dry and not oily, so this could be the ultimate BAD CHOICE for you.
2) Paul and I have talked about how it’s a good thing libraries exist, or we’d have to make some serious budget changes to afford books.
3) Oh, so discouraging about the meal! Arg!
15. Shelly | May 1st, 2008 at 5:23 am
Ok….Aveeno—-they have a day and night cream. I sort of don’t HAVE a regimen—I sleep in makeup—I only wash my face in the shower…..so i am NO expert……I ‘splurged’ on teh $15 per jar/bottle at wal-mart, and it doesn’t seem to break me out too bad….any time I use a new product, I always breakout until I’m ‘used’ to it…..and since it sporadic usage for me…..(like if I happen by the basket in my bathroom and think….hmmm…maybe I’ll moisturize), I can’t say for sure.
Oil of olay made hair grow on my grandma’s face. HAIR. I have way too much body and facial hair (those fine little hairs? HATE THEM), So, I chicken out of oil of olay. Why is it that I have plenty of hair sprouting on my NECK, but thin head hair? I DON’T GET IT.
What Elizabeth Berg novel did you snag? I’m jealous. I’m on a waiting list for them to ORDER her newest at my library. Sheesh…..same with DOOCE’S new book……my Barne’s and Noble DIDN’T HAVE the DOOCE’S book. It’s because they are considered a ‘small market’ so they don’t get all the books……..WTF? IT’S DOOCE. So my library is ordering it, too. I bet they would pre order like a MILLION of a Bill O’Reilly books if he had a new one…….but no DOOCE……
We have no thai restaurants here, so Pad Thai? I hear people LOVING it…..but I’ve never partaken. My husband complains that I cook with every pot, too…and DESTROY the kitchen. Tee Hee…he has to do dishes when I cook. I’m TELLING you….the fakeout Chicken Scallopini recipe that the Hy Vee lady gave me is an EASY, and FAST and AWESOME recipe…..
And like Mandee…..my goal today is to use ‘sexytime lube for bees’ in casual conversation today. With some poor unsuspecting individual. By the way, I, too, am grossed out by Royal Jelly–so I’ve not bought any. Any gelatanous stuff makes me get all heeby jeeby…..
16. Sadie | May 1st, 2008 at 5:24 am
Your description of the kitchen carnage after your attempt at Thai is brilliant. And, though I like to think myself an adventurous cook, I have never tried any recipe involving fish sauce, because I just can’t bring it into my house. Or smell it. Or see it. I know it’s in many of the Asian dishes I love dearly in restaurants, but it’s one of those things I’d rather never know about.
Re: night cream – I have oily, acne-prone, sensitive skin and I also cannot tolerate Philosophy products – I am pretty sure it’s the preservatives in them that make my skin nuts. And I feel sad that I can’t use them because of all the Philosophy Love. I digress…drugstore night cream = Cetaphil. Slightly more expensive and available online or at Sephora & some dept stores = Kiehl’s. Those are two of the few moisturizers I can use without Serious Incident.
17. Joni | May 1st, 2008 at 5:39 am
I’m usually not one for recommending stuff because then I get all paranoid that the recipient of my advice is going to hate it and it makes my hands sweat. BUT- I definitely recommend DHC products, especially the olive oil cleanser. My husband had horrible skin and nothing worked, despite countless trips to the derm. My sister finally recommended DHC and it is unbelievable. Plus you can get free samples of anything that you want to try if you sign up for a catalog. Gotta love free!
18. claire | May 1st, 2008 at 5:42 am
Before i jumped on the Proactiv bandwagon last year, i was a die-hard Neutrogena girl. Like Danell, the stuff the dermatologist prescribed for me DID NOTHING. USELESS. Probably for the same reason as her; they’re not cystic. Stupid adult zits. When you’re over 18, it’s just not cute anymore.
So for a moisturizer, i used the Neutrogena Oil Free Combination skin moisturizer stuff. It’s cheap, it’s non-comedogenic, fragrance free, and it’s pretty damn cheap. It’s also the only thing i’ve tried from a drugstore that didn’t make me breakout. Hooray for Neutrogena.
And pad thai? It must have been a moment of insanity that made you do that. That shit is HARD, dude. HARD.
19. TwoBusy | May 1st, 2008 at 6:01 am
(shaking head sadly)
20. jonniker | May 1st, 2008 at 6:01 am
Shelly: I got The Year of Pleasures. I wanted her new one, too, but they didn’t have it. I’m currently reading Chris Bohjalian’s The Double Bind, which is … well, I don’t really like it, but I’m determined to wrap it up so that I can move on with my life. And on to Elizabeth Berg or Michael Pollan (The Omnivore’s Dilemma)
21. H | May 1st, 2008 at 6:16 am
I rediscovered the library a few years ago and I love it. The only down side is that the new releases usually have a wait list and you have to return them within 7 days, which sometimes doesn’t work with my schedule. But, my list of books to read is forever long so there’s usually something older I can find. As a fellow list-maker, I may have to check out Goodreads. Like I need yet another list.
22. Inzaburbs | May 1st, 2008 at 6:59 am
Tell me about it! My husband was so desperate for real food (ie something not burnt, rubbery, undercooked or from a sachet) that he has started getting up at 5am to get to work early, so that he can then come home in time to cook.
As for the skin, you know what? I have tried them all and the only thing which doesn’t make me break out is Oil of Olay. Sad but true. I feel like I am turning into my mother…
My big problem recently is my hair. My hair does not like Texas one little bit. So now I am my mother, but with frizzy hair. I’d better stop there, I am breaking out in hives…
23. Jen | May 1st, 2008 at 7:23 am
Another Cetaphil girl here. Sounds like I have similar skin to you and this works great. Plus, cheap! Very cheap.
I’m a proud library nerd. Ours actually allows you to reserve books online and then they call you when they come in. The ultimate in library laziness – no browsing! Just pick them up at the desk!
I really liked The Year of Pleasures. Totally going to my library’s site right now to reserve her new one…
24. Lawyerish | May 1st, 2008 at 7:48 am
I use Cetaphil cleanser, and considering how great that is, I would think their moisturizer would be terrific, too. And CHEAP. Cetaphil, by the way, kicks Purity’s (by Philosophy) buttocks. It’s probably the same basic thing, anyway, but without the daily affirmations on the bottle.
I use an Aveda night cream, which I love, but for drugstore stuff I have had perfectly fine (and again, CHEAP) experience with Dove night cream and Aveeno moisturizer (I currently use an Aveeno daytime one with SPF and it’s really light and absorbs quickly and doesn’t smell like anything).
Incidentally, when summer comes round, I usually forego night cream entirely and I find it makes a huge difference in keeping the breakouts at bay.
25. Val | May 1st, 2008 at 7:56 am
I LOVE the library. I’m surprised you are just now nabbing a library card with as much as you read and watch movies. We have managed to work the online library request system so well that we know when new movie and CD releases will show up on the list, and thus are able to get them within a week or so of their release dates. For free! They just send me an email when we have a DVD or a CD or a book waiting for us. Did I mention that its free? Or at least that my property taxes support the library whether I use it or not, so its basically free? I love the library!
26. jonniker | May 1st, 2008 at 7:58 am
Val: I know! But in Florida, I worked in a different county than the one I lived in, which meant that the library closest to me was off-limits. And alas the library I COULD use was far away from home (I lived on the county line, too). I guess it was just … inconvenient. But after yesterday’s experience, I am SO HAPPY.
27. Shelly | May 1st, 2008 at 8:07 am
Ah, SNAP. My library just e-mailed me that ‘Split’ is in, and I’m not done with “Otherwise Engaged” and I still haven’t looked for “They Zygote Chronicles”………ahhhhhhhh.
28. Diane | May 1st, 2008 at 8:43 am
I just need to say that I feel better that Philosophy does not agree with someone else. Because of Sundry and Amalah, I tried it. My skin is still angry.
Ok, I know this sounds crazy…but I have very oily skin so I do know of what you speak. For some people, using oil on oily skin does wonders. It has helped me. I’m talking using extra virgin olive oil, jojoba oil, almond oil, etc. Something about the skin absorbing the oil, making it think it has enough, thus ceasing it’s own overboard oil production. I can probably explain more if you want to try.And Honey…that has helped my problem skin as well.
29. Erin | May 1st, 2008 at 9:27 am
Actually by checking books out of the library, you are contributing to society! Whenever you check out books, you help tell the library what people in your area like to read, which helps the librarian order stuff that will be popular! Also, it shows those people who like to slash library budgets that the library is valuable to the community
(I am the child of a librarian, does it show?)
Also, whenever I get tired of the ol’ shake and bake, I decide that it is time for the onion soup mix. Onion soup mix will make ANYTHING taste good.
Here is the recipe that I would make everyday if Will would let me:
Preheat oven to 400 degrees. Chop up a potato (or a few, depending on how much you guys like potatoes as a side dish and how hungry you are) and put the potato cubes (or slices, whichever you prefer) into the bottom of a baking dish. Put boneless pork chops on top of the potatoes. Sprinkle one package onion soup mix over the top of everything. Toss in a few spoonfuls of butter. Cover everything with foil and put in oven for 30-40 minutes or until the pork chops are done. I have a “thing” about making sure meat is cooked properly so I use a small meat thermometer to tell me when their temperature is correct.
Yum. Seriously. AND, all you have to do when it is done is toss a handful of salad onto your plate and you have all of your food groups covered!
30. Jen | May 1st, 2008 at 9:39 am
I am so making that recipe. Thanks Erin!
I came back to add my best tip for oily skin because it appears that there are a few of us…
Milk of Magnesia: Put a little on a cottonball, wipe a thin layer on your face, let it dry, rinse it off. Apply makeup as usual.
I should be embarrassed that I am putting a diarrhea medication on my face but I am NOT. It works.
31. Jules | May 1st, 2008 at 9:41 am
My mother’s dermatologist told her to never buy anything more expensive than Aveeno. So the next time I had to buy moisturizer, I switched to their ultra-calming day moisturizer. I just recently bought their ultra-calming night cream. I totally love the stuff. It’s evened out my skin tone so much and is definitely a drugstore brand. And now I don’t pay out the ass for moisturizer any longer.
Also, I definitely recommend Thai Kitchen box meals if you want a quick and dirty way to make Pad Thai, etc. These were a huge help to me in college.. just cook the noodles, stir in spices, chicken, etc, whatever you want to add. Easy peasy.
32. Kristin H | May 1st, 2008 at 10:02 am
I have to join the throngs (who knew there were so many of us?) of People Who Don’t Like Hope In A Jar. It doesn’t make me break out of anything, but the smell. Gak. I have tried for months now (as I use it all up because damn, it was more expensive than my usual stuff) to get used to the smell and it just sicks me out every single day. And also, my three-year-old tells me it stinks. Every. Day.
My usual stuff is Oil of Olay. I used to think that stuff was expensive. Am cheap, apparently.
Can I also add that I too am a newfound library convert? I had a long, drawn-out love affair with buying books but we are trying to save money for a house and I…well, I was running out of places for books. Between kids’ books and my books, there are just too many damn books in the house. The kids are super happy to have a new batch of books to read nearly every week. And I even get to use this stupid basket I bought at a party once, you know, those expensive ones? This was in my innocent days, befor I realized that if I went to a party like that, I would be expected to buy something. $100? For a basket? (Longaberger! That’s what they’re called!) Anyway, I never used it but now I am the mom with kids, walking through the library with a basket full of books on her arm. This, I realize, is a long way from my Colorado rock-climibing-and-shred-betty days.
Geez, Kristin. Go on much?
33. Moose | May 1st, 2008 at 10:03 am
My skin recently decided to explode in an almighty adolescent rage. I started doing the half second mirror sweep – where you let your eyes glaze over and then look at your face REALLY FAST just to make sure you don’t have any asparagus on your cheek. Then avoid reflective surfaces for the rest of the day.
Anyway, my skin has totally cleared up, thanks to the cheapest solution ever. Mix one part apple cider vinegar to three parts water (four parts, if your skin is sensitive) and use as a toner. (Only problem: it makes my face smell like apple cider vinegar. But I do not care, because I’d rather smell like apple cider vinegar than look like a pepperoni pizza with extra olives.)
I’m also very tempted to ply you with my favorite easy yet tasty recipes (stirfry!) (tom ka kai!), but maybe a little kitchen recovery time is warranted.
34. slynnro | May 1st, 2008 at 10:41 am
Aaaaaaaaaaand this is why I never cook.
And also why I live in Texas.
35. Leah | May 1st, 2008 at 10:54 am
Homemade pad thai tastes like stomach acid.
36. Shelly | May 1st, 2008 at 10:55 am
Noted! Royal Jelly is a no-go. I do not use mosturizer at all, as I have never found one that doesn’t break my face out. I have to use prescription face wash for my zits. To whomever said she isn’t suffering from acne bad enough for the dermatologists to help her, Honey, you are going to the wrong dermatologist! Get thee a new one! I wasn’t even having a bad break out when I went in, and they helped me immediately!
37. Shelly | May 1st, 2008 at 10:57 am
Aaaaand, I really liked The Double Bind. I figured out the “twist ending” well before the end. I’d love to hear your thoughts on it.
38. Melissa | May 1st, 2008 at 12:36 pm
Get the book The Skin Type Solution by dermatologist Leslie Baumann (sp?). Seriously, I have spent thousand on potions and lotions trying to get my skin behave. She gives recommendations based on your specific skin type which is determined by a questionnaire you take. Her recommendations have made a huge difference in my skin.
39. Nothing But Bonfires | May 1st, 2008 at 1:41 pm
I have a recommendation! I have a recommendation! I have sung the praises of Mario Badescu before, and I WILL SING THEM AGAIN. I was using Philosophy like everyone else in the world, and, you know, kind of liking it enough (I believe it changed my life for….ooh, a few months or so, in fact) but then one day……it just stopped working for me. And I was like “I’m not paying $38 for a small pot of Hope In A Jar if it’s NOT WORKING anymore.” And so I did some research (and asked a co-worker with porcelain skin what she used, who had, in turn, asked one of HER old coworkers with porcelain skin what SHE used,)
And the general consensus was Mario Badescu.
Seriously, man, go to their website and fill in this survey about your skin and in a few days, you will get SAMPLES. For free! And you can use them to decide if your skin likes them or not (free! free!) and if it does, you can order them for reals. No need to go to a Sephora! Or even a drugstore! There is even a discount for 15% off which some kind soul left in the comments of my Best! Thing! Ever! post a few weeks ago (which I did on Mario Badescu Drying Lotion: SOOOOOO amazingly good for clearing up zits.)
Anyway, TO MY RECOMMENDATION: Mario Badescu Seaweed Night Cream. This shit works, yo. WORKS GOOD. It’s like slathering your face in buttah at night, except when you wake up you are not oily and smelling of pie, but smooooooth and fresh and bright. Also, you look very rich — you know, like someone who gets regular facials. Plus, it’s $15. FOR A JAR THE SAME SIZE AS HOPE IN A JAR. It lasts you ages.
So! Here are your instructions:
1. Go to MarioBadescu.com
2. Fill in the survey and get yo’ free shit.
3. Use yo’ free shit.
4. Order whatever you liked from yo’ free shit PLUS the seaweed night cream, the drying lotion for the occasional zit (beecause YES, they will only be occasional from now on) AND if you’re feeling extra spendy, the enzyme cleansing gel for regular night-time face-washing. MAYBE EVEN ALSO the glycolic face wash, for once a week face washing. (I have all of these. I love all of these.)
5. Bask in the praise of anyone who meets you. Have co-workers ask you what you use on your (porcelain) skin.
6. Send Holly flowers as a thank you. And chocolate.
40. Elise Weiler | May 1st, 2008 at 3:26 pm
Luckily I’ve never had a huge problem with my skin, but Philosophy face wash? My skin HATED it!
I’m all for Cetaphyl (face wash and moisturizer). It costs $10 I think for a huge bottle and works really well.
41. Kathryn | May 1st, 2008 at 3:56 pm
Oh, man, do I ever feel you on the pad thai thing. Somehow, I got it into my head that I would like to try to make a sort of Thai noodle stir-fry one night. Used every effing pot and pan in my house, burned one into oblivion, and produced a disgusting, sludgy mess. Rice noodles are apparently very difficult to cook, or I am very dumb. And Thai sauces in jars can be pretty grody.
As for moisturizer, I like both Cetaphil and Pond’s Dry Skin Cream. My face is so dry that I generally always need the Pond’s, but sometimes the Cetaphil will do.
42. Desha | May 1st, 2008 at 11:19 pm
hmmm…Well I have the hope in a jar (for lips and eyes) and have samples the face cream but I honestly don’t looooove it the way I EXPECT to love something that expensive. I do, however, completely adore Benefits’ “dear john” cream. Am thinking of getting into Oil of Olay for their daily SPF and what is to me, nostalgic smell (and inexpensive prices!).
Libraries ROCK!
43. metalia | May 2nd, 2008 at 9:14 am
Kiehl’s Ultra Facial Cream (Not a drugstore brand, I know, but sometimes they have Kiehl’s at Target…does that count?) is the new god of my idolatry.
Also, I may have snorfled soda up my nose upon reading “RUN. RUN AWAY FROM THE BEE LUBE.” Well done.
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