Fly Me Away

Hola! Greetings from what has surprisingly turned into the Busiest Summer Ever. I hate that we’ve become the couple who is never home, but here we are! Never home! This never-homedness has resulted in a classic case of my old friend The Herp Lip. Oh, Herp. I’ve missed you so.

By the way, no sooner had I announced that I’m only seeing dead centipedes, did I find approximately eleventy million LIVE CENTIPEDES, scurrying about like tiny little mice with their hairy … well. That’s enough, I think, of the hairy centipede-talk, but the point is that they LIVE and are ALIVE and are not eating very many insects, despite that being their purported benefit, for I’m seeing plenty of OTHER insects, including a fly population that I killed off one by one last week. A fly population that sent me into fits, because oh my God, what if they are the MAGGOT OFFSPRING? What THEN? (Will likely kill myself. That’s what, then. It’s been nice knowing you all.)

Oh dear. Vermont is very buggy, and I wasn’t expecting it and I now realize that above all things, I am a pansy. Send reinforcements.

It’s funny — we’re heading on vacation very soon, and yet I can’t help but feel like I haven’t been home at all lately, so what am I leaving home for? Oh yes, RELAXATION. Oh ha ha. And although everyone I love is coming with me on vacation (yes, even the dog), I feel guilty, like our house is going to miss us and cry giant creaky tears because we’re not in it. A classic case of benign neglect.

It also speaks volumes that the biggest thing I’m looking forward to about vacation is the availability of poutine. I LOVE poutine, drunk or not and have done an embarrassing amount of research to determine who makes the best poutine and how close it is to where we’re staying. This is all so utterly ridiculous, as I’m talking about glorified GRAVY FRIES, but that is in no way stopping me, because I take my gravy fries (WITH CHEESE CURDS) very seriously.

Aaand, I’ve got a project to finish before I go to bed, despite being SO TIRED, so I’m afraid our (very lame) time is up, but not before sharing two things that have been occupying my time in the wee moments before sleep for DAYS:

1) I know people think that bloggers are exhibitionists, but that doesn’t mean I understand people who go on reality TV, specifically the foulest of (delicious) reality TV such as Big Brother. Who, no really, WHO, does such a thing? I’m trying to envision a scenario that I would willingly sign up for a reality show and … I can’t think of any. Not even if it were for $10M. Uh, could you?

2) Retaliatory judgment. I’m not clear why it’s okay to make personal attacks on someone you feel is judging you. Yes, maybe they were being an asshole, but why does that mean YOU have to be an asshole to THEM? For countless examples of this, one needs only to read endless strings of comments on ParentDish (Land of the Thousand Nutbags!), specifically those surrounding the WAHM/SAHM debate. I mean, that’s not the ONLY example of such behavior, nor is it one I REMOTELY feel like rehashing (SO NOT THE POINT) but it’s the most obvious I can think of at the moment.

Happy Wednesday!

*Goldfrapp

29 comments July 29th, 2008