Coal Miner’s Daughter
October 9th, 2008
Wait, was I talking about mortgage? Quick! Here’s a picture of a dog in an ill-fitting camouflage dress that’s too tight across the chest! And she hates it! And me!
Mother, it doesn’t even FIT.
(This is not the way to win the Truman-Sunny Dress Your Pug In Corduroy & Denim (and pig costumes!) smackdown. I’m all too aware.)
I really do appreciate all of your comments and e-mails from yesterday. I thought it was a good discussion, and although there were moments that I fear I was misunderstood, I was glad for all of it, even the strange e-mails where it seemed that people thought I was somehow attacking them personally.
Today, I’d like to talk about stem cell research and elective abortion. Personally, I … oh my God, I can’t even keep that charade up for more than four seconds. Also, this is why I generally keep my public opinions limited to things like Welch’s grape juice and the fall TV lineup (for the record, and I don’t know why this is, I look forward to Dirty Sexy Money the most every week), because I hate conflict and every time I feel like I’ve hurt someone’s feelings I want to ABORT! ABORT! WOOP WOOP WOOP! and yet this feeling never translates to ACTION and I press forward anyway.
This weekend, we’re off to the wilds of Scranton to visit my family’s cabin in the nearby mountains. As I joked on Twitter, I grew up not far from there, and am considering making it a part of my upcoming surprise presidential campaign. Because it seems, Scranton is at the epicenter of working class America, but part of me wonders if anyone’s actually ever BEEN there? Do the facts that my grandfather, a coal miner, died of black lung disease, and that I grew up near now-defunct Bethlehem Steel, subject of the working-class anthem “Allentown,” mean that I am uniquely qualified to speak on working class issues? What does this qualify me for, if anything?
I guess what I’m asking is, can I please be president? What if I go into extreme detail about the hardships my grandfather faced, taking his lunches deep into the bowels of Centralia, which burns like the fires of hell to this day? No?
All kidding aside, between The Office and swing-state politicking, one would be led to believe that Scranton is a hellhole packed with pistol-packing factory workers and/or dimwitted paper salesmen. While I’m not going to pretend it’s a gleaming metropolis of Atlantis-like proportions, it’s really not that bad, and parts of it are quite pretty and I’d … I’d live there, okay? I actually like Pennsylvania and hold a deep affection for most of the state, Scranton included. Provided you can get past the constant billboards screaming, “LIVE IT! The Lackawanna Coal Mine Tour!” that is. Because really, I can think of a lot more exciting things to do with your time than visit an old MINE SHAFT. (Although they do have picnic facilities! Dine on barbecue chicken after you learn about hard coal times in the Shifting Shanty!)
We won’t be touring any coal mines, but instead will be stuffed silly by my father’s incessant cooking (I hear chili’s on the menu!) and will let Sunny frolic unleashed in open pastures. I hope you have a great weekend.
Happy weekend!
*Loretta Lynn, and no, I don’t own it, I … well, that’s a first. Sorry.
Entry Filed under: Nuttin'
21 Comments Add your own
1. Nora Bee | October 9th, 2008 at 9:05 pm
You know, I like Scranton too. One of the prettiest drives of my life was on the way there for a wedding on a drizzly fall day. I was all, why is this not the biggest tourist attraction on earth. Have fun!
2. A. | October 10th, 2008 at 4:57 am
“Today, I’d like to talk about stem cell research and elective abortion.”
You crack me up.
3. Sadie | October 10th, 2008 at 4:58 am
I am sure I’ve driven past Scranton, because I have driven through Pennsylvania many times, but I’m drawing a blank. I can remember staying overnight in York once though! And Wilkes-Barre, I remember that.
On the Today Show this morning they did a piece on Joe Biden and his trumpeting of his Scranton working class roots and his “Lunch Bucket Joe” Everyman persona – except he and Jill made $360k last year, live in a $3 million dollar home, and only gave $995 to charity in 2007.
4. Kristin | October 10th, 2008 at 5:21 am
Your Dad must be beside himself in delight that you can eat again. Have a great time! I personally will be busting out the Bissell to clean my carpets this weekend. While this is not very exciting for the normal person, you know how satisfying it truly is.
Also, before you invest too much money in your campaign, it seems that running for president might be diametrically opposed to your desire to avoid conflict. Just sayin.
5. Becky | October 10th, 2008 at 5:34 am
I was coming back down to Philadelphia from the Albany area one time and took the highway that goes past Scranton. I LOVE The Office, so I was all excited to drive through town. Unfortunately, the highway doesn’t actually go through town. Oh well.
It was one of the most beautiful areas I’ve driven through, though. I love the mountains out there.
6. sigh | October 10th, 2008 at 6:26 am
aren’t all abortions technically elective? it’d be so much funner if i hadn’t actually had an abortion on wednesday. *sigh*
and i think you have to wait a couple years to legally run for president, though. not quite 35 yet. but that’ll give you time to prepare your every-woman, coal miner’s granddaughter platform.
7. Corinne | October 10th, 2008 at 7:05 am
I always get a charge when they talk about Scranton. My husband’s family is from Olyphant – and outside of my own family I haven’t met a more conservative-voting bunch. I love them all dearly.
And it’s lovely this time of year.
8. Danell | October 10th, 2008 at 8:36 am
Do you realize that Sunny has the MOST PERFECTLY wrinkled pug head EVER?
9. Moose | October 10th, 2008 at 9:47 am
The adorable pugness is raising my spirits after a morning of NPR and financial news-reading. Never have I been so glad to not have any money to lose.
MORE PUG!
10. H | October 10th, 2008 at 9:51 am
I love Sunny’s outfits! There’s nothing like a dressed-up pissed-off dog!
11. Gaby | October 10th, 2008 at 11:11 am
I just got back from Pennsylvania this Tuesday, and I will go on the record and say that I love that state! I went to grad school in Pittsburgh, and I was in Mercer for a wedding, and all of it is just beautiful.
12. Style Bard | October 10th, 2008 at 12:32 pm
Awww, Sunny.
PS, looooooooooove Dirty Sexy Money. I just started the first season and am DVRing the new ones and it’s like, Where Have You Been All My TV Life?? Honestly, I laugh out loud more at this show than any other.
13. Amy K | October 10th, 2008 at 2:31 pm
The company I work for has quite a few customers in small-town Pennsylvania, and it always cracks me up when they call because they use the term you’uns (pronounced yooooons). Example: “Do you’uns carry that product in blue instead of green?” I’ve started to think of Pennsylvania as The You’uns State. It’s a beautiful place, though. My best friend went to Penn State and I loved making a fall road trip through the mountains from North Carolina to State College every year.
14. Carolyn J. | October 10th, 2008 at 3:26 pm
How DARE you talk about the fall TV lineup !!!1!11!!!
15. susan | October 11th, 2008 at 6:11 pm
Isn’t Steamtown in Scranton? I just had to post that because I am awfully proud of myself for knowing about Steamtown.
16. Nic | October 12th, 2008 at 6:39 pm
I prefer to acknowledge that The Office is Scranton more than anything else. It’s weird seeing it in the news so much. I grew up in the Pocono Mountain School District so Scranton was left to field trips and going to the mall.
17. MsPrufrock | October 18th, 2008 at 11:43 am
I can relate to the misconceptions about Scranton. I’m from Harrisburg, and repeatedly I have seen this area referred to as backwards and my personal favourite courtesy of PBS, “a blue-collar backwater”. Seriously?
I’m moderately wordly, what, with the whole living in another country and another culture thing, and I don’t view my hometown this way at all. I was desperate to get out when I was a teenager, but as you said about Scranton, I would totally think of living there if we headed back that way. I’m an intelligent, liberal, cultured person with non-bumpkin interests, so it can’t be too much of “blue-collar backwater”. Bloody PBS.
18. clean your bowels&hellip | November 22nd, 2008 at 6:32 pm
clean your bowels…
This was a great article pertaining to clean your bowels….
19. clean your bowels&hellip | November 25th, 2008 at 2:18 pm
clean your bowels…
Where did you learn about the ideas in Ontario Floorball/Unihockey Federation (OFUF) – FLOORBALLONTARIO.COM …?…
20. Jessie&hellip | November 28th, 2008 at 6:08 pm
bloody bowels…
Nice entry. You made some great points….
21. Potts28Jeannette | June 24th, 2010 at 1:25 am
I will recommend not to hold off until you get enough money to order different goods! You should just take the personal loans or just sba loan and feel comfortable
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