The Finish Line
January 12th, 2010
I tell you, one of the biggest cruel jokes is that when your baby starts sleeping through the night, you are more tired than you were than when she was getting up twice a night. Well, I am, anyway. What IS that? It’s like your body suddenly decides to break down and become a weak shell of its sleep-deprived self.
And. AND! When your kid DOES get up in the middle of the night, someone might as well have set off a gun over your bed, because WHAT THE EFF IS THAT NOISE?! WHAT IS THAT? A teething Sam woke up shrieking at 4 a.m. today, and both Adam and I jerked bolt upright, staring at each other through the foggy veil of sleep wondering WHAT THE HELL IS THAT? Did someone BREAK IN? Oh Christ, it’s the BABY. And I was so ridiculously out of it that I pumped a big ole money shot of Motrin directly into her hair, requiring multiple trips to the living room and dragging out the entire process in a manner that my more-efficient sleep-deprived self would have SCOFFED AT.
I know. World’s tiniest violin, what with my sleeping baby, I know. I don’t blame you.
I went to a wonderful playdate today at my friend Kate’s house (hi, Kate!) for the first time, and though I got there with relative ease, I made a wrong turn on the way back and ended up in some ENDLESS LOOP of Green Mountains, which sounds idyllic and charming, but really felt like some sort of awful blend of Groundhog Day and Deliverance, because — as is typical in Vermont — there was no cell service for most of the drive. As I said to Kate later, I was POSITIVE I ended up in a wormhole and if I tried to go BACK to Kate’s to figure out where I went wrong, her house wouldn’t even be there anymore, and I would be forced to figure out how Sam and I could survive living in an apartment above a store named Jaques, which is mysteriously pronounced JAKE’S, and what IS THAT? JAQUES = JAKES? WHO IS JAQUE? And I didn’t even notice an APOSTROPHE.
This, along with macaroni and cheese loaf (LOAF. IN THE DELI CASE. SLICED FOR SANDWICHES. WITH CREEPY GROUND MEAT IN IT) will remain one of Vermont’s most enduring mysteries.
At any rate, because I mentioned them the other day, and a few people asked and because I like accountability, here are my 2010 goals to date. This seems terribly self-serving and obnoxiously narcissistic, so just please know that I’m self-conscious about it, and don’t blame you one whit if you don’t care. I PROMISE.
Oh, I want to add more, but it’s a start. Some, however, are shamelessly stolen from Jennie. And if I may say so, number one on this list is so far making me SO EFFING HAPPY! You guys simply rule, and the discussions people are having, and the fact that people are reading the books and talking about OTHER BOOKS and I love you, man. There’s no other way to say it.
1. Organize and launch an online book club (CHECK CHECK CHECK BOOK LUSHES CHECK)
2. Read at least 30 books
3. Submit for-fun, non-blog, non-paid (yet!) writing to at least three new places (one down!)
4. Get my fingers thin enough to wear my wedding rings again (yes, seriously, it’s been A YEAR)
5. Buy a really great pair of expensive jeans
6. Find a decent babysitter and leave Sam with someone other than a relative
7. Attend BlogHer ’10
8. Take Samantha to the beach
9. Plan a real family vacation
10. Buy a really great piece of original art.
11. Find a financial planner
12. Take Samantha to meet her great-grandfather and extended family she hasn’t met yet
13. Donate my time and/or items (food, clothing, money) to at least one charity every month
14. Have a piece of clothing custom-made
15. Become strong enough to do a real push-up
16. Make Adam’s birthday as special as he made mine
17. Go away for the weekend with just Adam
18. Call my brother every two weeks
19. Get a decent calendar and write every birthday in it
20. Come up with one signature dinner dish and one baked good to cook for guests/bring places
21. Frame all of the unframed pictures and art in our home
22. Take one picture every day (already failed, but tomorrow is a NEW DAY)
23. Make salted caramels
24. Redesign my blog
25. Wear makeup at least once a week
26. Introduce Sam to her Auntie Meredith and meet her little peanut when she arrives
27. Learn to make bastilla
And with that, I hope you have a fantastic Wednesday.
*Snow Patrol
Entry Filed under: Beeber McSteebs,Nuttin',Uncategorized,Vermont
40 Comments Add your own
1. seadragon | January 12th, 2010 at 9:53 pm
I had the exact same experience when my son started sleeping for more than 2-3 hours at a time (he’s now 23 months). I felt like my body had forgotten how to sleep in moderation and was sleeping SO HARD that I just ached all the next day. Don’t worry, your body will adjust soon and then you’ll really be enjoying your sleep!
(I can’t remember if I’ve commented here before or not, but I’ve been reading for a few months now I think. So, hi!)
2. Megan | January 12th, 2010 at 10:50 pm
I am LOLing at the Jacques thing–that’s my sister’s last name, pronounced Jakes. Oh yes, I’m serious. That’s why I’m giggling!
Re: financial planner–email me if you want, J is one. It’s what he does. He does this for our fams, some friends, friends’ parents, etc.
And the calendar. Erincondren.com. I’ve gotten her giant calendar for 3 years now, love it.
If you come up w/ a dinner or baked good, I’ll trade you for some app recipes I’m good at. The only baked good I can make is monkey bread.
3. Lippy | January 12th, 2010 at 11:23 pm
Oh, it is brutal when they start to sleep then wake up. I found I was very compassionate when the baby is wee. But once they sleep through the night, not so much with the patience. I love your list.
4. slynnro | January 12th, 2010 at 11:33 pm
MAC AND CHEESE LOAF?
That is so wrong. WTF VERMONT?
5. She Likes Purple | January 12th, 2010 at 11:53 pm
I don’t find it narcissistic at all. Now let’s talk more about my list.
(I love the signature dish one. I want to do that, too.)
6. Erin (Snarke) | January 13th, 2010 at 3:10 am
I like your list. I haven’t even thought about goals for this year yet. And the sleeping thing: I don’t have kids but I absolutely do that sit straight up in bed and do the whole “what the hell IS that?!?” whenever I get woken up–especially if the noise happens right as I’m about to fall asleep. There’s something about that moment that amplifies everything so that an ant blinking sounds like a giant boulder crashing through the roof.
7. Jess | January 13th, 2010 at 6:39 am
Love the idea of the book lushes, but I am #93 on my library wait list so I’ll get it in about 5 years. Keep linking here when you pick the next book and I will try and jump in then. (Also, pick some that aren’t brand new for us library I-don’t-buy-books-cause-of-the-clutter gals)
And for #4- after my first child I had to have my rings resized because they never got small again. But the good news is that during the pregnancy and after my 2nd I didn’t have to take them off.
8. Jen | January 13th, 2010 at 8:24 am
Great list! We have mac n cheese loaf here in NY too. No idea why someone would necessitate pasta in a loaf form, but SOMEONE must be buying it, right?
Re:#15 – I am working on the push-up strength too! Trying 1 a day, then 2 the next, then three…and so on. Today I’ve got to do three and my shoulders feel funny just thinking about it.
9. Raven | January 13th, 2010 at 8:53 am
Am totally creeped the eff out about that macaroni loaf.
10. Kader | January 13th, 2010 at 9:01 am
A bit of further strange lore about Jacques: There are two stores in this town (and, really, besides the public buildings, that’s it for non-residential–can you say isolating with an infant at home?). The town is divided between the two stores. Since I only go to the *other* store, I had never seen the horrifying mac and cheese loaf. Now I’ll never go in.
Glad you got home and that home still existed.
Any time you want to try out your signature dish and baked good on me, I’m in.
11. The New Girl | January 13th, 2010 at 9:14 am
OMG. DUDE.
I laughed OUT LOOOOOOUD at the description of the start you get when your sleeping kid screams bloody-ass-murder in the middle of the night and the resultant bumbling. HILAAAARIOUS and so true. I don’t know what it is, other than your body is all like, ‘HEEEELLLS YEAH! Finally I gets me some SLEEP!’ and so is working off sleep debt, which makes you double-stupid in the middle of the night. I? Also get Sleep GREEDY and when my normally sleeping kid starts waking up at night for whatever reason, it pisses me off. As if I wasn’t just up EVERY TWO HOURS for like, A YEAR.
I love your goals and I have a GREAT recipe for a Tortellini Pasta Salad that is FABULOUS both to eat, and to take places. People want it all the time. If you’re interested. Guess that’s not exactly a ‘Dinner Dish’ though…
Also? Book Lushes officially seals your hero status, for sure. I love being there because it’s like I KNOW everyone (not really but like, two degrees of separation, right?) and it makes it so much more personal and friendly and SUCH an awesome place to talk to like-minded people. Nice.
And now? My marathon comment is OVER.
xo
12. Lawyerish | January 13th, 2010 at 9:50 am
I made your list, I made your liiiiiist! I cannot WAIT to meet Sam and see you again and also OMG introduce you to our daughter.
2010 is going to kick all kinds of ass.
13. Jamie | January 13th, 2010 at 9:58 am
Oy, the birthday thing. I can remember every phone number we ever had growing up (and those of most of my childhood friends) but I cannot seem to remember people’s birthdays. I need to add that action item to my 2010 list.
14. Jess | January 13th, 2010 at 10:43 am
This is an awesome list of goals. I am very excited for your 2010. Thanks for sharing!
15. Mama Bub | January 13th, 2010 at 10:48 am
Might I suggest a Snapfish calendar? You can enter in dates to be pre-printed on the calendar which is a royal pain the first time you do it, but it SAVES the information, so the next time you create a calendar you can just add those dates right in. You can also deselect certain dates if you no longer wish to include them, and of course add to your list as you wish. I’m sure you have a pile of cute baby pics that are dying to be on a calendar!
16. Annie | January 13th, 2010 at 11:12 am
The best way to build up to doing a “real” push up is to start with a wall push up. I know it sounds silly, but it really helps your body (chest, upper back, shoulders, arms) get aligned properly. Then you graduate to “girl “push ups,” which I have no problem saying are the kind of push ups I elect to do! And then “real” push ups (just make sure your back is parallel to the ground and know that depending on where you position your hands, you will work different parts of your body. And then… THE WORLD!
17. Nicole | January 13th, 2010 at 11:57 am
I have a “mom” calendar – an agenda-type – that has a column for “mom” things and a column for “rest of the family”. It has cutesy pie stickers for birthdays and such, and it makes me happy. This “mom” calendar brings joy and organization to my life in the way only a really good calendar can.
18. Nicole | January 13th, 2010 at 11:58 am
Okay, sorry, I didn’t see my first comment so I rewrote one…sorry about the weird duplication. Apparently I feel very strongly about my mom calendar.
19. Kristin H | January 13th, 2010 at 1:34 pm
The real cruel joke is that everyone talks about “sleeping through the night” as this attainable goal that you can strive for, when in reality sleep is as elusive and ever-changing as kids themselves. Last night I was woken up no less than FIVE times by my two kids. So, uh…there’s that to look forward to.
20. JenniferL | January 13th, 2010 at 3:16 pm
I just laughed right out loud at my desk. Your description of night wakings after sleeping = dead . freaking . ON. So many times I have woken up wondering “what is that NOISE? Fucking Neighbors!” only to realize it is my spawn. And then I get pissy – like “what the hell is your problem kid? just sleep!” Best mom evar
21. HollyLynne | January 13th, 2010 at 5:45 pm
Make salted caramels! That has been on my mental to do list forever but I forgot to add it to my 2010 list. *scurries off to add it*
22. Leah | January 14th, 2010 at 12:40 am
BlogHer’10 and Meredith. I’m going to try to make that a twofer, myself.
23. julie | January 14th, 2010 at 1:03 pm
I haven’t been able to wear my wedding ring in over 4 years now. Don’t sweat it.
Hope you do make it BlogHer. Would love to meet you.
24. Sweetney | January 14th, 2010 at 2:30 pm
I would SO eat a mac-n-cheese loaf.
Stop looking at me like that.
25. kris | January 17th, 2010 at 2:48 pm
This isn’t obnoxiously narcissistic!!! Just don’t YouTube video of yourself when you get up to 50 push ups. Then I take you out back.
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