This post sponsored by my baby’s butt

So! In case you were wondering (which I highly doubt you were), I’ve continued working with our friends at Huggies, this time to talk about wipes! WIPES! And poop. Yes, poop continues. Poop. I’m so sorry, to those of you who are sensitive to such things (Yes, Suebob, I’m looking at you).

I took another gig with Huggies because, again, they’re great to work with, and their wipes are genuinely fantastic and again, I swear, I wouldn’t say this if I didn’t use them. (I’m sorry, but everyone uses their wipes … don’t they?) I bounced around on diapers for a little bit, but I’ve used, and continued to use, with very few travel-related exceptions, Huggies wipes from the first day Sam was born. My mom gave me approximately 80 containers of them, and I thought that was SO MANY and would last until she was THREE, but HA HA HA, NO.

The idea here is that we’re all, through the magic of blessed, blessed wipes, living a poo-free summer. Which, um, WOULD THAT WIPES MADE POOP DISAPPEAR ALTOGETHER, but alas, unless they are miraculous wipes that digest and sweep away poop without it ever leaving the body, never to be touched by human hands (and, uh, I believe that’s a colostomy bag, and no thank you), well, that’s never going to happen. Let’s face it.

And honestly, the wipes work great for their intended purpose — they do! Even when things get, um, less than fresh up in here (and trust me, there will be a VIDEO DISCUSSION of a recent issue with HELPFUL TIPS I wish someone had given me, but it’s likely that you are all much smarter than me, and already knew these helpful tips, in which case, you can just laugh at me. I won’t be offended), they get rid of all the offending bits, and my kid’s bum is fresh and shiny and hallelujah.

What I kind of wish people had told me before I had kids was that not only will I use wipes to remove poop (and, let’s be honest, substitute for a bath on the laziest of days) (What?), but though wipes might not be the miracle I prayed for, they are good for, um, EVERYTHING. You guys, I use wipes on my kid, on myself, on my kitchen floor, on her high chair, on flipping EVERYTHING. EVERYTHING.

I can’t think of anything in the world that is so convenient, yet so effective. Baby wipes! Equally useful on tiny baby asses AND ceramic flooring! And come ON, if they’re gentle enough for my child’s oh-so-sensitive baby behind (and though she has moments of Baby Bum of Steel, trust me, ‘TIS SENSITIVE), I know they won’t, say, peel the finish off of my dining room table (from, um, Target, so it’s not like I care), or ruin the grout on my ceramic floors.

Sometimes, and this is the truth, I think of a day when the wipes won’t be in my life anymore, and I don’t like that image one bit. Because I’m sorry, the adult wipes are not only NOT THE SAME (and also? EW), but the anti-bac wipes — excuse me, MOIST TOWLETTES for the purse are way harsh, dude, so … well, I might be the only person in the history of ever who continues to buy Huggies wipes in bulk, long after her children are out of diapers, and no longer pooping outside of the toilet.

(Disclaimer disclaimerflarketeckin: This is, shocker of shockers, part of a deal I did with Huggies. Yes, they pay me, but no, they don’t tell me what to say. Swearsies.)

15 comments August 3rd, 2010