Folsom Prison Blues
February 1st, 2011
I can’t believe I’m talking about this again, because I KNOW how painful and stupid it is, but you guys. YOU GUYS. THE SNOW. IT WILL NEVER STOP. I know, I’ve seen the tweets about how there’s a winter whining warning! OH HA HA. Clearly these people don’t live in Boston, is all I’m saying, because as of right now, after ten more inches today, the piles of snow are bigger than my house. MY HOUSE. And it’s not stopping! It just! keeps! coming! My sister called this morning and said precisely what I’ve been saying on repeat, WHY? WHY? WHY?
And Jesus, sweet longtime reader Leigh was so totally right when she said it’s contributing to any sort of lingering sadness, because feeling like your house is going to be eaten, because of the walls! of! snow! and not being able to go anywhere and having playdates canceled over and over again is like, WHOA OH MY GOD WE ARE ALL GOING TO DIE HERE. As I write this, I have dirty hair and am wearing these hideous blue toile pajama bottoms from Target, because it’s what I wore to bed last night, and it’s all feeling very futile, this getting up and getting dressed business. After all, where are we going to go? Nowhere! NOWHERE, THAT’S WHERE.
Ahem. I’m sorry. If you need me, I’ll be here in my hideous toile pajamas (WHO PUTS TOILE ON PAJAMA PANTS? WHO BUYS THEM?), spending hours coming up with new marinades for the fourteen pounds of London broil I have in the freezer. Oh, and fingerpainting. By myself. Or perhaps coloring with my box of 64 crayons that Adam got for ME ME ME for Christmas, because it appears that I enjoy coloring more than Sam does.
Here! Have some bullets:
– I’m on Day 17 of The Neverending Post-MC Period, and no, my doctor isn’t concerned for a bunch of detailed reasons you don’t need to hear right now (or, um, ever), but if you were wondering if THAT is as special as it sounds, I ASSURE YOU, IT IS. SEVENTEEN DAYS. GOD CREATED THE EARTH IN FEWER DAYS.
– I’ve always wanted to write a post on this, but it’s a little self-important and all kinds of complicated, but MAN, does it ever GRATE MY CHEESE that somehow the definition of feminism has become, for some, particularly in the pool my blogging peers swim in, WE MUST SUPPORT WOMEN, NO MATTER WHAT. I … what? Look, I’m not going to agree with a woman just BECAUSE she’s a woman, and I remain unclear how it turned out that it means that we can’t CRITICIZE something a woman does! I certainly have no issue criticizing something a man does if I disagree with it and/or dislike it. (I’m looking at you, Ryan Murphy and your sexist approach to character development.)
Oh, but wait — we CAN criticize women. We, as women, are free to criticize celebrities. Yes, we have free reign to make fun of celebrities’ boobs, hair, makeup and outfits. How very progressive of us. Oh, wait. And Sarah Palin. We are free to criticize Sarah Palin. But other than that, not so much. We are supposed to SUPPORT each other, didn’t you know? We’re supposed to support women’s right to speak up for what they believe in! Unless what I think or what I believe in contradicts what another, more docile woman believes in, in which case, I need to sit down and be quiet, because I’m just jealous, and what I said wasn’t nice and I’m just creating drama. Because women are supposed to be strong and outspoken, but we are also not supposed to say anything at all unless it’s something nice.
No one, for the record, would dare say that to a man. And yet, people say these things, out loud, without even considering for a second the irony in what they’re communicating.
(And I swear to God and everything that is holy, I am not thinking of a specific instance here, and my friend Kate can even attest that I have been thinking about this post since at LEAST the summertime. AT LEAST.)
(Edited to add that I, too, make fun of celebrities, so weirdly, I don’t object to the practice. I’m a People subscriber, for heaven’s sake! I BUY US WEEKLY. I AM WHAT IS WRONG WITH AMERICA.)
– Given the shitshow that was January, I haven’t even begun to look at my 2010 goals to see how I stacked up, or come up with anything for 2011, but I have exactly one, so far, and I think it’s a decent one: Read for fun. Just fun. Yes, I want to read at least 40 books (a wussy number, but whatever), but I’m also tired of reading things I SHOULD read, and right now, I just want to kick back and read stuff that entertains me, even if it’s embarrassing, which means Franzen’s “Freedom” will have to wait, because I’ll be busy with something lame and pink-jacketed over here.
Have a happy Wednesday!
*Johnny Cash. Because honestly, I feel IMPRISONED. BY SNOW.
Entry Filed under: All Riled Up,Gettin' thinky with it,Miscarriage,Nuttin'
37 Comments Add your own
1. Jessica | February 1st, 2011 at 10:29 pm
I moved to Boston this summer, right when the heat wave from hell hit and then didn’t leave for 3 months. Now it is the winter from hell and I’m wondering if moving here was such a good idea.
Ugh, it is oppressive. And people without kids just don’t understand how oppressive it is. I have cancelled so many outings I am thinking about never leaving home again just so we won’t get our hopes dashed every day. Ugh. Ugh. Ugh. A little nice to know there are other stuck folks going stir crazy.
2. Danell | February 1st, 2011 at 10:39 pm
I know I will get no sympathy here, but I am hating Virginia’s weather even more right now. It’s 70 degrees! No, it’s snowing! No, wait…ice! There is ice and hail! Oh, back to 60 degrees! Have some more rain! For crying out loud PICK SOMETHING. I am SICK (literally…with a cold that will not GO AWAY) of being improperly DRESSED every day AND having improperly dressed KIDS every damn day.
Sorry about all the snow, though…I do remember how bad shoveling all that sucked.
3. NGS | February 1st, 2011 at 11:03 pm
So, I just don’t know where we’re going to put any more snow in Minneapolis. We’re running out of room. Fortunately, this current Snowpocalypse just went through leaving us with only about 6 inches of snow and not another two feet because otherwise we would just never be able to open our front door again.
I swear we are not going to see grass again until May. And I don’t think I’m exaggerating, either.
4. ABDPBT | February 1st, 2011 at 11:31 pm
You’re just another mean girl on the internet. And I should know.
5. Kate | February 2nd, 2011 at 6:41 am
Wait, is the long-awaited post (partial post, bullet) going to be eclipsed by SNOW?
So be it.
Weather is a much more accessible topic.
Dude. I miss you.
6. A. | February 2nd, 2011 at 9:09 am
I totally hear you about reading for fun, and how sometimes fun = embarrassing. But I don’t care either. I just want to enjoy myself and life’s too short to read something just because Oprah told us too or it’s a NYT bestseller or whatever. I think your 40 books is admirable. I set a goal of 25 myself.
So, I agree with you. And not just because I should because you’re a woman.
7. Kristin H | February 2nd, 2011 at 9:09 am
Not to worry, the groundhog didn’t see his shadow today. That means spring is right around the corner! (Grabs shovel, whacks groundhog.)
I realize you did not ask for book recommendations, but if you haven’t read “Horns” by Joe Hill, it’s great.
8. Dr. Maureen | February 2nd, 2011 at 9:59 am
You can’t help but talk about the snow, because there is nothing else. There is but snow. Snow is all. Snow snow snow. My kid will never go to school again. No more gymnastics, no more visits, no more anything. Only snow.
I don’t know about you, but when I’m stuck in here alone with two little ones, I feel like I am the ONLY ONE the snow is affecting and that I am being punished for something. Obviously I know this isn’t true with my head, but that’s how I feel.
9. Life of a Doctor's Wife | February 2nd, 2011 at 10:35 am
Ugh the SNOW and the GREY. Blargh.
I agree with you fully about the women-criticizing-women issue. Shouldn’t feminism EMBRACE our ability to criticize one another? It seems anti-feminist to say, “She’s a woman, so you can’t criticize her. Otherwise she will cry or become hysterical or swoon or whatever.”
STOP SNOWING.
10. Deanna | February 2nd, 2011 at 10:59 am
You should take a picture of the snow for all of us who can’t imagine what that much snow looks like. We were stuck inside here in North Alabama for about three days (with a whopping 8 inches of snow), so I can only imagine how miserable y’all are right now. By the third day, we were going out to lunch if we had to WALK there.
Love the many directions of this post. I have some thoughts on the women unequivocally supporting other women thing, but they aren’t very coherent at this moment, so I’ll just leave that alone. You’re welcome.
11. Josefina | February 2nd, 2011 at 11:41 am
Re: Feminism
Preach it.
12. Jennie | February 2nd, 2011 at 12:09 pm
I’m all skittish about recommending books to you now! My next recommendation could lead to your next awkward author tweet!
But have you read The Girl’s Guide to Hunting and Fishing? It’s ancient, in terms of fluff, but it’s one of my favorite books of all time. I read it when I was single and it just spoke to me in a very real way. I re-read it once a year or so. And I never, ever re-read books.
13. natalie | February 2nd, 2011 at 12:23 pm
Please save your self 5,000 pages, and DO NOT read Freedom. PLEASE PLEASE trust me on this. IT sucks, the characters are idiots, and the plot is booooooring.
I don’t understand this either that we become “judgmental” if we offer our opinions about women or we are considered not supportive. Aren’t we allowed to have opinions too? Someone has to be the voice or reason…..
I’m telling ya read The Giver (so short, get you to your 40 in no time) and “Why My 3rd Husband Will Be a Dog” it’s so funny and lighthearted. Check my blog sidebar for the books I read last year….
14. Kate | February 2nd, 2011 at 12:39 pm
I want to see a picture of the mountain of snow! We don’t get snow like that where I am, and I’d love to see what that looks like.
15. natalie | February 2nd, 2011 at 1:06 pm
I did not read Corrections, so I can’t comment on it. But, Freedom is terrible. Do not trust Oprah. I’m saving you $$ and brain power here do NOT read this book.
Psst, don’t tell Jennie, but our book tastes are not the same either! She only likes books if they are heart-breakingly sad and dysfunctional. I’m sometimes in the mood for this, but most of the time our book tastes do not converge. This is going to be a problem since we started a book club together this year…..
16. april | February 2nd, 2011 at 1:58 pm
I hated Corrections – it’s one of the few books in the last five years that I didn’t bother to finish. I won’t be picking up Freedom either.
We have no snow. Actually, it was 81 degrees yesterday and it’s 76 degrees today but with an oppressive humidity because it’s been threatening rain and I wish it would just do it already. But I had strep and a fever and I wore a sweatshirt and fuzzy socks all day.
17. DCZia | February 2nd, 2011 at 2:42 pm
You are trapped by massive snowdrifts in your house with a TODDLER, and all the bizarre hormonal blood-and-milk-and tears after-effects of the D&C. You have my UTMOST sympathies, and I hope you are well-stocked with wine. I oathe Franzen, haaated The Corrections, and cannot possibly condone that you read Freedom. Instead, I fully condone wine plus fluffy pink-covered books. For some hi-class fluff (it’s pretty well written, but ain’t quite literature) try Penny Vincenzi. She got me through a long cold winter with a nursing newborn a couple of years ago.
18. drhoctor2 | February 2nd, 2011 at 2:48 pm
Stuck in the house with the ball of kinetic energy that is a toddler…yeah.. i feel you. BTDT..wept into the t-shirt. I will say..getting out , if just into the yard, porch , drive way and seeing Sam tumble around and try to climb snow piles might help.
know that I’m saying this from the retro view as I am sitting here in glorious glorious enforced inactivity..SNOW DAY !! YES!! * Snoopy dance* i slept till 8 !! WOOOOOOhooo.
My elec is still on , my drive way unshoveled..don’t care..nobody’s is coming except my teen agers friends and their all big hulky teens for the most part so ya know…
i should make… it gets better ‘ videos for parents in the under 5 arena….
19. Christine | February 2nd, 2011 at 5:03 pm
I am so very very sorry you’re snowed in. Bah to this winter.
I did laugh at toile and at the fact that feminism in blogging is/can be pretty craptastic.
Hoping things look up and up for you.
20. Lara | February 2nd, 2011 at 8:43 pm
Yes, yes, yes! (I am getting a cold and my brian is muddy, so this is likely not going to be coherent, but, anyways…)
Women supporting each other is fantastic. But, uh, not expressing your opinion because the other party is a woman is going AGAINST feminism, for the love of pete.
Speak your mind! Disagree with people! No, you (and of course I don’t mean Jonna you, but the collective you) don’t have to be a dick about it, but speak your mind, even if your opinion goes against what someone else (or everyone else) thinks. In less feminist times we weren’t allowed to have an opinion. SPEAK!
I’m not advocating that people poke their heads in other people’s business or get all “WELL, aaaaactuallly…” whenever anyone expresses an opinion they disagree with, because that is just douchey, but discussions are good! Both sides might learn something if the conversation is a discussion and not a poo-flinging monkey fight.
And “creating drama”. Oh man. A phrase ONLY APPLIED TO WOMEN. I hate it. When someone says “she’s creating drama” what does that mean? Is is “Sit down and shut up, missy”? Or perhaps is it that we are supposed to treat (just some?) women like delicate shrinking violets who can’t handle big, tough, emotional discussions? hurraaaay for feminism…?
Yay for you for writing about it. I think the same things but I can’t get them out of my brain on onto paper like you can. (Obviously).
And I’m sorry about the snow.
21. velocibadgergirl | February 2nd, 2011 at 8:50 pm
Maybe if you hadn’t shot that man in Reno, it wouldn’t have snowed so much. Just saying.
22. agirlandaboy | February 2nd, 2011 at 9:37 pm
If 40 books in a year is a wussy number (esp for a mother who cares for a toddler all day), I have all the fortitude of an earthworm.
23. Leigh | February 3rd, 2011 at 1:27 pm
One word: California. 70 degrees and sunny in SF today.
24. Kerri Anne | February 3rd, 2011 at 5:20 pm
I wish I could come to your house with an Oregon-sized blow dryer and melt all of the snow. Quick! Someone invent an Oregon-sized blow dryer!
Also, in bullet form, because I’m a joiner:
-I once had a period for THREE months. I was convinced I was dying. Or that I was going to murder someone. (All of that to say: I FEEL YOUR PERIOD PAIN.)
-Coloring is my favorite. I actually think if more people colored the world as a whole would be a happier place. “Egypt, I’m sorry about everything. Here, have a coloring book.”
-I’m so excited about reading this year, even though my reading list has everything to do with making the GRE’s my bitch and nothing to do with “fun.” But actually, I think I’m going to be giddy happy once I get waist-deep into the list. Which I think makes me some sort of super nerd.
-Happy! Thursday, babe.
25. willikat | February 3rd, 2011 at 8:31 pm
That’s what MN is like a lot in the wintertime. Like, a lot. So I have to say, for once, I am not dealing with the snow shitshow, and I like it. I LIKE it.
26. Katy | February 3rd, 2011 at 8:53 pm
I’ve been reading a lot of crap lately too. I should be reading something more literary, but I can’t get myself in the mood.
If I were dealing with snow like that, I’d be in full-on freak out mode.
27. Corinne | February 4th, 2011 at 1:07 pm
A couple things, just real quick like:
1. 40 books is not a wussy number. I did the challenge on Goodreads and the average is like 73 books. WTF, please? there are 52 weeks in a year, and although I read very quickly and enjoy it very much, I also have a job and kids and bills to pay and food to eat. Jebus, people. 73 on AVERAGE?!
2. Freedom IS fun reading. Seriously. Put a pink jacket on it if you want, but it won’t matter – after the first 10 pages you’ll be SUCKED IN. Like The Corrections but MORE SO.
3. Hugs to Sammo (Sam Bam Thank You Ma’am, Sam I Am, Slammin’ Sammy) for helping you through the miscarriage. I had an early mc between my 2 bebes and experienced a lot of what you’re describing. I would have been a complete floor-puddle wreck if it had been the first pregnancy, but with Little Miss around to keep me distracted/on task it was just a bad bump in the road. So that’s my explanation for a few hiccup sobs on the Sam photos, just ignore me it’ll be ok.
4. Have you SEEN the tournament of books!? http://www.themorningnews.org/archives/the_rooster/the_2011_tournament_of_books.php
I’m so excited, I ordered some Field Notes to get the special notebook. Talk about reading for fun.
Hugs!
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